March 31, 2013

Doesn't God Want Me To Be Happy?

Spiritually counseling others through family, individual and personal crisis for years, I get asked many questions in regard to others behavior and God's will.  People have said if God doesn't believe in divorce or retaliation then I have to ask, Doesn't God want me to be happy?  I understand this question well.  Others will say, I think ____ because God wants me to be happy. 

God tells us not to lean on our own understanding.  He also tells us that His thoughts are not like our thoughts.  He is omnipresent, seeing the end of all time from the beginning of all time.  We cannot begin to perceive as He does.  However, we can believe that He desires for us to be happy and then ask Him to explain our situations to us in ways that we may mature and be stable.

Not only do I work with people surviving domestic violence, I also have lived through it.  There were times when I was told that God sometimes wants these things to happen to us for various reasons.  I do not agree.  I believe that God desires us to love one another and to treat each other as He loves us.  But we decide we do not want to.  Much like a toddler when they say NO, I don't want to. 

God is not going to force us to change, but He will change us completely when we say okay, I want to change.  Why will they not just stop doing what they do, is another common question I get asked.  If any of us could just make all new habits and never fail, we would be the most self disciplined people God created.  This is what the pharisees and Sadducee's accomplished, rigid discipline. 

The problem with rules without love, is that while we can push ourselves to do right, we usually do not love others well.  The reason is our focus is always on our self, how we look, how good we are doing as we compare our self to others.  This causes hatred, bitterness, isolation and many other ugly things.

God understands that we cannot change without first being loved well.  It is through being loved completely that we are completely changed.  Do not think that God will put you in a place and abuse you in order to help another.  God, will use isolation, hard times and other things to get a rebellious souls to say "mercy".  There are times however, when others will be in your space, maybe friends, parents, a spouse or siblings and they will decide "I don't want to treat you right!" "I don't want to stop!"  These are the times when God's holy spirit will be right with you grieving and beseeching you to not retaliate due to hurt emotions. 

God expects us to be at peace, first with Him, then with others so that we may be at peace with ourselves.  When others mistreat us - God will help us deal righteously.  Romans 8 explains that just because evil was done, does not mean that evil will win out.  God will turn their hurts into help for someone else.  You see God doesn't need to harm us in order to teach us - But if we are not listening or others get onto our paths and create chaos, He is perfectly able to rectify the situation.

Look at all that Christ encountered.....Isn't that proof? 

Have faith - believe in God and Love all He created - That's justice and the heart of  a victor!

In Christ,
Kisses,
Candace

March 28, 2013

US; Not You and Me

Lead US not into temptation. Deliver US from the evil one. For thine is the kingdom and the power for ever and ever. Amen


My apologies for the silence; I have been sitting prayerfully with our thoughts and studying deeper. 

If you would, really read each word and line of today’s information.  Prayerfully consider what the Lord desires to personalize and disclose more deeply with you.  Pick it up again later or in a few days, you will be surprised what He reveals over the course of personal interactions.

Next week the links below will be woven throughout our journey, as we seek to relate more authentically to the real and living God.  I pray that each of us has an intimate encounter with the Lord God Almighty as we bring His life experience into our reality this Easter season.

With Deep Affection,

Candace

 

Like a child’s deep wish; a hope from the heart

The request released, from the voice of the sound

From the heart to the head, into the heavens received

Came the yearn of the soul, “Be freed in me…”

With a smile it was heard; and with joy it was done

At the very time they hoped, they also clearly heard

For your love is great and you’re troubled for me

Because I am not bound here, we both now are Free.

~Candace Huffmaster

 
Have grace and peace; be Christ’s Priests, here on earth as it is in heaven.  We are told in Revelation that before God’s throne is the seven-fold Spirit.  The Lamb was slain and is worthy to receive: the power, the riches, the wisdom, the strength, the honor, the glory and the blessing. And so are we that are in Him. 

We are purely lavished in His blanket of Love and under wing. What / whom shall we fear??

Freely give Him blessings of Joy with your mouth.  Glory through your faithful actions of doing everything to everyone as if it were Christ himself (even in the most intimate of ways), honor him by not refusing the wisdom the Holy Spirit is continually attempting to pour out before you. Be humble enough to give Him gratitude for all things even your very breath.  Allow Him to be honored and brought glory by your loving affection toward Him as it flows with all power and might into the moments of your encounters and efforts every second of every day.

And lastly, as a child, have no fear; especially as you drift off to sleep, give him your deepest affections by trusting and counting on Him to be right there tenderly watching His beloved child sleep.

What an awesome Love, please allow Him to love you like this……please…..

Kisses,

C

To Kiss My Beloved

 

 

Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®
©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Rights Reserved

March 21, 2013

Clarifying One Thing - Safety

We have been speaking about safe relationships for several weeks.  The reason I am sending this out is because I want everyone to be clear:  You do not "stay" in a physically abusive relationship.  You Stay in the protection of Christ. 

Just to reiterate my opinion toward advising others about making a decision: there are many choices between staying with an abuser and divorcing them.  Pray about it.

If you are dealing with this issue and would like someone to speak with.  Please reach out to us and read the information daily. 


With Love,
Candace

Up, Up and Away!

It is always so obvious why God has our groups headed in directions - but never as obvious as everything we have been taking a journey through with Good Friday on the horizon. 

God made sure He was stable and trustworthy.  He had to be able to love us without leaving.  He could not be limited to our ability to love. Otherwise, He would never have the joy of relationship.  Christ is the only one who will ever know the pain of having everyone, even His father abandon Him.  But He loved us anyway and didn't stop.  He could do this, because He trusted His father and His mighty love for us.  He understood, if He didn't, we would never be able to comprehend how life essential this one things is: Staying.

Say what you will about people, but you can get a whole lot wrong if you will just let people know beyond the shadows of doubt, they will still find you standing there.  Yes, things get icky, sticky and gooey as we wrestle with creature comforts, happiness and the things we must lay aside to properly care for our wife, husband and children.  But Christ died, rose and gave us the rights of His authority then settled right down in each of us to encourage us to pick up on how He can help. 


John 6: 60-67   On hearing it, many of his disciples said, “This is a hard teaching. Who can accept it?”

Aware that his disciples were grumbling about this, Jesus said to them, Does this offend you? Then what if you see the Son of Man ascend to where he was before! The Spirit gives life; the flesh counts for nothing. The words I have spoken to you—they are full of the Spirit and life. Yet there are some of you who do not believe.” For Jesus had known from the beginning which of them did not believe and who would betray him. He went on to say, “This is why I told you that no one can come to me unless the Father has enabled them.”

From this time many of his disciples turned back and no longer followed him. "You do not want to leave too, do you?” Jesus asked the Twelve.
 
 
Why do we run?
  • Because it's HARD! 
Why do we stay?
  • Because EVERYONE deserves to to be loved....no matter what! 
How can we stay?
  • By realizing how kind the Lord has been to you and me and putting away all evil, deception, envy and fraud. And stripping off anything that slows us down, holding us back and especially the sins that wrap themselves so tightly around our feet and trip us.
God doesn't leave us because He knows we are broken.  Instead, He sits down piece by piece and show us where a piece goes.  Then He uses His loving- kindness to mend the fractures.  But He doesn't leave once we are piece-milled back together and looking NICE!  He knows we will break apart again without Him.  So He sticks around for clean up on isle 9. 
 
All He desires is a reciprocating soul who commits to never leave Him or forsake Him.  Why?  Because leaving isn't an option for Him.....He made up His mind and will not change!  Isn't that superhero cool?
 
I want to love others like that; maybe I will even get a cape and leotard which says "Faithful and True" Because I want to be faithful to others and He who helps me do that is TRUE.
 
Up, Up and Away......;)
From Christ, to Me and You - Kisses,
Candace


Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®
©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Copy Rights Reserved

March 20, 2013

Left Destitute

Yesterday we thought about being left destitute. We discussed the icky, sticky, goo sandwiching people together intimately. If you did not get a chance to look at that click here before continuing on, please.
Most of you reading this are married. Did you marry a Ladies Man, a Man's Man, or the man of your dreams? Hopefully, you married the man and while it is good to discern character and integrity, do you have him trapped in your dreamworld man. But what about the men? (Yes they do this also) Did he marry his "dream girl" and now she has to be some imaginary "every man's dream". As we stated yesterday, love is kind, not manipulative. We are in relationships to help guide each other in reality, not fairy tales. We can set some pretty unrealistic expectations of what real life can actually be verses what we perceive is the real life everyone else is whimsy-ing around in.
Here is another look at how we can be unrealistic or unsafe with those loving us:
When someone is a perfectionist, they can't let you off the hook. They cannot allow you to set a hook either. They will do anything even hook you deeper to escape any pain. While we must be able to express how relationships affect us, this is only to communicate the icky, sticky, goo. After the mess has been defined, it is time for everyone to pitch in and just do clean up on isle 9. That's all! So this pain, they are fantasizing about doesn't exist except in their mind. They create much more pain for themselves and other, than the real world would ever toss their way.
Our relationships are lived in. Do you live in a home which must be museum ready at all times. Or can you be at home in life? I pray that you think about what we said yesterday, in regard to being able to hold up your commitment to allow God to be at home in your space.
Add the thought below to all this, and tomorrow we will dive deeper:
John 17:20, 21 “I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, 21 that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me

We know God is a jealous God. We know that Satan is a deceiver trying to take our affections away from God. We have spoken about this being the reason we are on PAUSE. God is taking back what is rightfully His. Christ stated this over, and over, and over as He went walkabout for thirty something years.
Christ came for One cause; YOU.
to relate intimately WITH you

In Genesis 2:24 it is written: Because she was taken out of Man: For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall cleave to his wife and the two shall become ONE flesh.
Christ was in heaven, but he left heaven so that He could fill all things with love. We needed more than mercy; we needed grace in order to be ONE. But dare I say in our own futility we strive to survive with mercy alone. We do not want all that comes with Grace because we have to make choices. We walk in the futility of our own minds which excludes us from the fullness of life God designed us to have.
Why do we beg for the grace of God upon ourselves, but with those around us we demand God to be impatient with their process? We all know that answer, selfishness. Which brings us to our topic for today:
partial re-post from November 2011
Women, A Woman, A Wife:
A christian woman should not be a "man's woman" she is to be HER man's woman. A christian man is not to be a "lady's man", he is to be His lady's man! Yet men want to attract the eye of ALL women (or at least the one's that catch his eye). and Visa - Vera. God did not want man to be left alone with nothing but animals which would have fed animalistic behaviours. He wanted man for a higher purpose; relationship and to create higher relationships.
Have your desires wandered? Are you not grateful for the blessings God has given "YOU"? Don't be so quick to answer.....think about it. Have you spent thought time and energy giving goodness into what God has graced you with? Or have you been belittling and abusing the relationship?
When you do any of those things you are telling God you are unhappy with what He graciously gave you. You are feeding your animalistic selfish nature and digressing. God loved you before you loved him. You already have been filled because Christ came and filled you. So why do we "feel" we need to steal from someone elses wealth? Greed's an ugly thing my friends.
Let's choose this day who we will follow as for me and my house we will follow the Lord. Because only from heaven flows every good and perfect gift.
Let's all be wives who are holy, lovely and pure to our husbands; let's be a woman with One Cause - to be women witnessing that God's love for Christ is real; Christ is real..God is REAL!
Kisses,
Candace
Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®
©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Copy Rights Reserved

March 19, 2013

It Is So Icky!

How often I have wanted to gather your children together as a hen protects her chicks beneath her wings, but you wouldn't let me. Matthew 23:37
Look, your house is left to you desolate. I tell you, you will not see me again until you say, 'Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord.'" Luke 13:35
No, I will not abandon you as orphans--I will come to you. John 14:18


With God as our witness, standing before a crowd of family and friends, men and women come together daily promising to never leave or forsake each other as long as they both shall live.  And yet they leave breaking promises and pummeling hopes, dreams, commitments and the abilities of those in the wreckage to painstakingly attempt to trust in safe people ever again. 

I will never leave you nor forsake you is what our vows say – Hmmmm, haven’t I heard that promise somewhere before?  Oh, that’s right…….God said it.  This is HIS promise unto each of us.  God is not a masochist; He knows we cannot uphold relationship commitments by sheer grit.   We are made in His image; and we are ABLE to do this …..Because He lives.  Don’t you get it?  If we could do it without God, then He would not get to be intimate with people.  Not physically, because He doesn't have a body like ours. He created a loop hole though; He lives in this world now INSIDE us!  Again, don’t miss this:  It is not US who won’t leave people destitute.  It is God within us; we simply must allow His will to mature us.  But our weak will cringes at thoughts of the Spirit: having to put up with all the icky, sticky, goo of close relationships. God said He wants to wrap us under wing...some people would think that is terribly suffocating!

I had someone say to me once, “ I won’t leave you destitute.” It appeared that they felt this should be something to trust as if to ease my hurt.  This left me scratching my head in bewilderment……I said to myself, “Do they not realize destitute means left forsaken.  What does that mean; you won’t leave me - destitute?  I’m obviously not a rocket scientist, but what this person communicated was that they WERE LEAVING……and therefore any physical token tossed my way to comfort their guilt would not articulate trustworthy.  
We have discussed many times that we can only do our part – this is the reason God tells us, “Be at peace as far as it depends on YOU.”   No one can repair or reconcile a relationship without a reciprocating “you” involved; agreed?  If someone does not desire peace “with others” then they only desire comfort for them self.  The reason we get confused at times, is because some of the things others receive comfort from happens when they comfort us.  Maybe this is the reason for all the proverbs in regard to the deceptions of our feelings.    Comfort is the nemesis to maturityespecially in our maturity within Christ’s body, click link if you want more information.
The scripture from today, is the perfect example of the Love God desires to lavish on everyone.  But as we see, not everyone wants to REALLY be loved.  Who knows all the reasons why they find it terribly uncomfortable to stay close, really let others in.  So they leave;  It does hurt and it even harms them, us and anyone else entangled. And, it deeply grieves the Holy Spirit, but they say no anyway......And God keeps trying anyway.....and as trying as it is, we must keep try relying on Him.
Before we even knew Him or loved him He promised that when He had to go for a bit, to remember that we ARE His beloved, not a destitute no one. It feels so wonderful to be safely loved that we attempt to love others this way....because it's freaky awesome!   But not everyone trusts that we will stay and love them even when they are icky.  Just as they don't want God too close they will not want you there either, not if you intimately love them through and through.  Do you know why?  Because it is God loving them...not you (remember).  So, we must have boundaries, because we are peacemakers. 
We cannot force peace because then it is not kindness, it is controlling.   Do not allow yourself to be verbally bullied either, you are a peacemaker; not a mute point.   If you are attempting to relate with immaturity (or call it whatever you wish) it will repeatedly verbally and sometime physically desire to push you out the door, so to speak.  We do not have to take part in destroying relationships, but to not speak the truth in love also destroys intimacy.  As we stated, the old saying “If you don’t have something NICE to say don’t say anything at all, creates fake friends. 

My thoughts for this week are:

Don’t be pushed around, your peace is from within you.  Don’t take part in destroying lives which are woven into your relationship:  Be stable, Be reliable, Be trustworthy, Be FAITHFUL!

If you are blessed to be in close proximity to an unsafe person, remember it is easy to want to think the problems go away if you just get new people around you.  If God desires your space for a bit, let Him use it - you just might get to help someone find out that the icky, sticky, gooey space is the actual “safety rail” keeping them from falling off into the land of the lonely and unloved.

Be brave my courageous peacemakers!  We live in a war zone, no matter how proper it may appear. Don’t just say and do the “right things” say and do the really hard things because it’s righteousness oozing out of you.  And lastly, remember:  With God as your witness, in all you say and do…..simultaneously you are His witness that He is alive and well in YOU!   

This is why where Christ is there is liberty, so honor your commitments – Don’t leave God forsaken!

In Love with Christ,

Kisses,
Candace

Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®
©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Copy Rights Reserved

March 18, 2013

What DO You Want Me To Do?

Today's information may be retrieved by either link below.  Have a tremendous day!
Kisses,
Candace

Kisses C

Daily Sojourn

  • If you click on the Daily link, you will have to click on the internal link to view the painting.

March 15, 2013

Movin' Out!

I want to weave two thoughts of thread through what we will think about: Christ used his own blood, not the blood of someone else as a sacrifice.  God divinely tied us all together. And yet we are allowed to think we are detached from the universe, if we so foolishly want to allow our minds to lead us in that direction. 

Many centuries ago, it was written:

For God has consigned (penned up) all men to disobedience, only that He may have mercy on them all [alike]. Romans 11:32 AMP
 
He also told us that all things are common which we go through, to each and every man, in 1 Corinthians  10:13. 

What if God, through Christ here on earth had chosen to take the life of all those sinning.  When the disciples desired to call down fire from heaven and Peter sliced off an officers ear, what if Christ had not stopped spoken peace and reattached the ear?  What if He had decided the people were right with all their taunting and jumped down off the cross?  Then said, "Enough!"  "Spill your own blood for your own sins!"

Why don't we ever stop to think about this.....really think about it.  Why do WE want people to "pay for it"?  I want justice as much as the next guy.  But I want restoration, reconciliation and transformation.  Okay, part of me is twisted enough to think that people should be forced to be kind, from the heart type of kind to others, as in Liar, Liar where they simply CAN'T act wrong.  Deep down however, I just want there to be a sincere Utopia where I can let my hyper vigilant discernment down so my really Pollyanna nature can whimsy all about.  REALLY....what's wrong with that picture?  Why can't everyone just think, do and project the best, highest, healthful things??

I hear many of you now shouting "Enough Already!"  Back to topic.....

As I have been racing around this week working with tender souls in crisis.  There has been a very common thread, which is the reason for my "verbal slathering" of what-not above.  Each conversation and pain was woven with this "thread of anxiety":  Why are there so many horrible people around me, everyone is trying to push me away.  So many of them state they have no friends they can count on, really count on.  This includes family most of the time.  They understand that life is busy and everyone has problems, but it is sad.....and so very common!

We have spoken about keeping our peace so many times.  Check out the prior years deeper information on the topics here:  Help Me Escape, Fear of Bridges, Created to Sound, When We Don't Know...Search, , When Crisis Blows Through Town, Until You Shake No More

When I hear the out pouring of these hearts, crying out that they must move because they know something better is out there.  I ask them "where is this magical kingdom, I'd like to tell others like you to go as well?"  I am not mocking them, as it might appear.  When the question settles in their reality and their irritation with my words is stilled, they almost feel a bit hopeless.  It is at this point where God can work with us.  Give us a glimpse of what He is up to.

Peace is a messianic blessing as we know.  Utopia isn't out there somewhere in some mysterious space, that would be out of our control.  God is not mean, always casting the impossible our way; He is loving, kind, gentle.  He is also firm and dependable, because He is FOR our evolution and eternal design.  When He instructs us to "keep our peace"and to allow His peace to "rule in our hearts and minds" that the indwelling of the Holy Spirit is empowering these supernatural capabilities.  We cannot do it "alongside Him".  Only He can jump in and do the heavy surpassing work which our human strength cannot under-gird.  We do not get to say, "God has matured me, now I got this one."  No, we must stay humble and say....my maturing has me to the point that when I need to do something I can not do, I implore all which He alone is, to overtake my human form and BE glorified by desiring to use my body to do it "through". 

Let's make this simple: Everyone knows about the "trickle down theory" and "the ripple effect".  These are not Christianise.  When we define a problem as we state often, that is the where the hard work kicks in.  Many people want to stop at the theory, or get stuck in the "which came first / chicken or egg" phase. 

Let's look deeper than the surface of the affected body of water:

  • What is the larger source from which the fluid is dripping?
  • We get that in order for there to be a ripple there is some form of a collective body or fluid, but what is the source of the foreign object object causing all the commotion?
Think about when Christ was walking above the water, or speaking into the storm.  We all know He said, "Peace Be Still, I AM" to which the air stilled as did the turbulent waters.  Now Picture this:
If through Christ, the Holy Spirit is settled down within us, and we allow Him to live large and overtake us, then when we are all chaotic and He says "peace, be still, I Am within you!", why do we flail about so much?  Why do we not keep our peace? 

Keep the picture going here:  If Christ stills us right in the middle of our storm, why don't we open our mouths and give Him our vocal cords and breath to give a shout out around us?  Wouldn't all disturbances around us be stilled or scattered? 

This in my imagination is the perfect picture of the ripple effect.  He dropped out of the heavens into our perfect storm and stilled us.  The vapors not desiring to be stilled raise up and are cast out from our shalom.  They rise up causing an outer ring but as others in that outer area allow the spirit to do the same, the rise and the calm spreads out further. 

Now picture the stillness of the calm surface, smooth as glass.  Revelation 4 says: In front of the throne, there was something like a sea of glass as clear as crystal.  I know there will be no turbulent waters in Christ's body of water.  In His divine order life is a culmination of cause and effect.  What will you cause?  What is the effect of you droplets today?

We would like to believe we are not "that" pivotal in the "grand scheme" of things.  However, once we began to forming as part of the equation in the mind of God, nothing was that would be without our first breath. He dropped us into this body for a reason, a cause and an effect.  He is the origin or breath.  He filled the corners of all that is with His air.  For just one moment could you pause and picture this?

Look outside...really stop what you are doing and look outside :) 
Listen, watch.....God's own breath started all this.  He upholds it, moves it about, and keeps it alive.  He does this!    Let Him drop you somewhere that needs what He is within you.  Be the weighty droplet falling from heaven and allow Him to change the whole environment. 

He might choose to skip you across the surface, but if you are willing He might drop you right into the depths of the darkness.  Either way, He is perfectly able to rise up and move out what needs to flee.

Because He lives, WE are effective!
What will they witness today?
What will your witness say?

Peace and Love to you all,
Kisses,
Candace 


Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®

©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Copy Rights Reserved





March 7, 2013

Pray For Your Frenemies!

They will act religious, but they will reject the power that could make them godly. Stay away from people like that!  ~ 2 Timothy 3:5
We know that God's word plainly explains that we cannot love something we hate.  He also tells us that the one who fears is not perfected in love.  When we fear something or someone, in regard to harming us, we must stay away from them.  If they have proven to be unsafe, why would we STAY? 
Isn't this the question that everyone always asks?  Why do they stay?  If you have every let someone in "pre" proof, you know it is not always easy to get away safely.  There also become fears, which you can be more afraid of than the fear you have been able to survive with.  But we must move on, because defining a problem is not the answer....it is only clarifying the situation.
Not every individual (females mainly) are raised under wise teachings.  They did not learn what Proverbs 25:14 states:
A person who promises a gift but doesn't give it is like clouds and wind that bring no rain.
Our word, love, care, friendship is a gift to others.  God tells us not to make promises to Him and not fulfill them.  He is just as concerned that our yes be yes and no be no with those we commit to here - probably more so in many ways. 
In fact, he tell us who cover others (lead in anyway) we are responsible for anything we do which harms their understanding of God.  Not loving others well,  due to callousness, harms their ability to trust.  Let me explain a bit further:
When you have an ongoing fear of something, you hate it to some degree (as we stated before).  When you trust or have faith in some one / thing you will love it.  We know that only God perfectly loves, but He gave us the ministry of reconciliation when we miss it.  Unless we give ourselves totally unto Him (His faithfulness),  He is not able to complete His good work in us.  Ergo we cannot be perfected within His love. 
Each time we hit a fear, we find a wall.  We say that fear grabs us, however it is more accurate to state that we grab fear and run with it.  We could just as easily grab love and bring it in close.  Only when we lay all our fear down and allow God's power to blow up, or tear down that dividing wall, will we ever make it beyond it.  In Jeremiah 23:29 We are told that it is like dynamite:
Isn't my word like fire or like a hammer that shatters a rock?" asks the LORD
In 2 Corinthians 10:4 we are reminded to use God's mighty weapons, not worldly weapons, to knock down the strongholds of human reasoning and to destroy false arguments.  If you are someone who has faux-relationships around you still, discern, pray and watch out for their traps.  God tells us all things in advance and He will never leave you in harms way.  Do not attempt to get ensnared through any human reasoning or false arguments.  Leave room for God....Christ is with you right where you are and He alone knows the secret passage way in which you will not be harmed in any way.
He is a very just God, pray for your frenemies and Love the Lord with all your heart.  Believe and do not doubt in any way that He is faithful "to you!"
I pray peace and sweet rest for each of you today,
Kisses,
Candace

Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®
©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Copy Rights Reserved

March 4, 2013

Fee Fi Faux Friend.....

“Fee Fi Fo Fum, ask not whence the thunder come. For between heaven and earth it’s a perilous place, home to a fearsome giant race. Who hunger to conquer the mortals below, waiting for the seeds of revenge to grow…”

The original usages of this rhythmic statement was by Shakespeare (not exact phrasing) and versions of Jack and the Beanstalk.  Maybe sometime we will get to the deeper applications, however today we are keeping our focus on this perilous place / earth, the mortals we are amidst and the seeds planted.   Let's look at how the giant was aware of a smelly foe in his house.  His character aside and the reason for searching out the intruder, upon catching a whiff of the displeasing odor, he was proactive about protecting his property. Questions:  Can we smell the stench and spot the fakes among us?  Would we run after them in confidence bellowing, "FEE, FI, FAUX-FRIEND!"

Knowing this might be a bit abstract, I'll explain further:   We know what a faux finish is, they have been used for over 5,000 years. As this creative expression evolved, over time, great recognition was awarded to artists who could actually trick viewers into believing their work was the real thing.  This is creative expression and not a bad thing.  God is not against things being improved or evolving to a higher form to reach their best; but He is angered by a con job:

Matthew 23:27.  Hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs--beautiful on the outside but filled on the inside with dead people's bones and all sorts of impurity.

Not everyone desires relationships for healthy reasons. But have you noticed they never tell you this upfront?  They con us to lure us in.  We must also realize not all people understand that they are unhealthy and hurt people.  Some people keep trying, but will not accept wisdom, therefore they continually leave wreckage all around them.  Our focus here is not them however, it is being able to identify the faux-friends. 

Persons not desiring a mutual balanced relationship all have the same pattern.  As soon you allow them in  and they are feeling relatively confident of your faith in the scam, they will begin letting  a string or two of their suit unravel to see or test how you handle it.   One of their most subtle threads is when you speak they will slightly discount you; this will go on till they have successfully muted you. Don't be surprised.  The reason why is quiet obvious; they must always be in control of the string pulling and only expose what they think they can distort.  If you can still see clearly, they are at a disadvantage.

It will play out something like this: you see something and it doesn't agree with the storyline you have been told, so you speak up to clarify.  All healthy relationships are built on trust and awareness, it is how intimacy is built and protected.  They test the relationship, to qualify their skill and your buy in.  If they need to back you off because they are too exposed they will do something like:

  • Turn up their voice or cut yours off
  • Walk beyond the reach of your voice, if your voice won't stop walk out
  • Stick around to show you how much they do not care / disconnect their empathy for you
Once you are stabilized they will reenter as if nothing happened to toss you a few crumbs.  If you appear to have forgotten about it, then all is well.  Do not think they get scared of being exposed.  This is their goal.  To be totally exposed and you not react is their sweet spot.  We get discombobulated because we try to make it something mysterious and hidden, instead of plain as the nose on our face. This was the reason God did not want us to have knowledge of good and evil.  It kills relationships, which destroys our very life.  Proverbs 26:25 tells us a bit about their disguise:

They pretend to be kind, but don't believe them. Their hearts are full of many evils.

As evil as their actions are, the real devastation is the harm inflicted upon your heart, mind and soul.  Will you allow their lack of loving kindness to damage you?   Will they change you? Will you loose who you are and become like them? May that NEVER be!

We all change, as we have been discussing, but we do not all change for the better.  We all grow up, but we do not all mature.  We know all things affect the great picture and if you do not believe this is true now, I pray to God that you realize it prior to horribly affecting tender soul. Yesterday we were discussing the reality of all conversations.  These immaterial things alter the universe forever.  We cannot be muted or erase, that is the good news.  

All relationships shift, so we must not hold on so to them.  Christ even said to the women at the tomb not to cling to Him because He had not received His resurrected body.  We are to allow Him to cling to us, receive our fulfillment from relating with Him.  But this doesn't let faux-friends off the hook. We are responsible for our actions and inactivity is still active.  It is just a negative action.

When our "someone" accepts our invitation of relationship, we are so excited that good things pour from us with out even realizing we are doing them; at least for some of us.  However, if  it is not mutual the imbalance will negatively affect your energy.  If the person who accepted the invite was not interested in a real relationship you will begin to feel unappreciated.   Since this was the only reason they wanted in, when your energy levels drop and your good tidings wain a bit, they will begin grumbling and complaining.

If you stick around, or do not find space from these types of individuals you may get worn down by the constantly bombarding of convoluted precepts and intentions.  If you still don't do something  your spirit begins to grieve and you soul sinks down.  Again, this where they want you; this is their payoff.  Now they have a space where they don't have to keep their uncomfortable suit on. Will you just lay down and give up your space? It is never too late to rise up and shout "Fee, FI, Faux-Friend!" 

Friday, we discussed the crumb tossers, and how they starve us to get us to chase after their crumbs.  We do not wait for a whole cracker to be presented.  Think about how Satan did this to Jesus in the desert, just before he offered him the worldly suit. Christ had to be starving, it had been 40 days and He had no food.  But He did not listen did he?  He said man will not live by bread alone, but by the very word which preceds from the mouth of God.  So let's not grovel for their crumbs.  Let's get our crackers from the Lord, okay?

Our last point today is this: Discern if those you are listening to, and preferring (like husbands and wives are supposed to prefer each other and the body of Christ is to prefer each other) are they encourager's or discourager's?  If no matter how hard you try to be something positive in their life and you get only crumbs in return.  Chances are they have no cracker they are "willing" to extend your way.  They would have already done it without you groveling for it. 

Do not stay close to someone who is disonnected to how their life affects others.  Also do not allow people in who can define a problem really well, but don't have a propensity to extend compassionate efforts to give you a better relationship just because they can.  Do not become any ones mute point. God created you to add dimension to this world, He is delighted with your beauty.  And whether anyone else EVER truly is a real friend to you or not, He will continue to do a good work with your life. 

In other words, only let people in your sweet spot who want to be around you because you make them want to be a better person.  These are the people to hand an invite to.  They will keep you energize because they enjoy being with you, sojourning.  And you know what, this will make YOU want to be a better person just because you know you can be, not because if you don't they won't throw you one of their disgusting crumbs!

Below is a clip from As Good As It Gets.  Even if you have see it before I encourage you to watch it.  Think about how we pull out our measuring tapes and size up who we invite in.  People even you and I hurt others, but we don't have to break them - that is a choice.  Lastly, if your sweet spot gets ransacked, don't get so desperate that you accept just any crumb.  Let them prove they are they are a worthy, equal suitor for the spot.  Use lots of healthy honest dialogue, I guarantee it you talk with them long enough their threads will unravel and they will have to run for cover. 




I pray that you have many people surrounding you telling you that YOU make THEM want to be a better person.  I also pray that they love you so well that eve when they have a stray string, you cover them in case some fabric flies off. 

God love you, each and everyone!
Kisses,
Candace

Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®
©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Copy Rights Reserved

March 3, 2013

Which is Your Favorite Label?

A Penny saved is a penny earned - With debt being what it is due to greed and lack of delaying gratification, this saying has more meaning than ever.  We need to pray about how we spend our pennies – it matters, they do not come easily. But they sure do GO quickly.  But this is not our direct topic today; however, it does have relevance. 

We have been speaking about being proven trust worthy. Let’s say: Trust Kept is Trust Earned.  We can only earn trust if an opportunity is given.  When the invitation is in our hand, we then have an opportunity to give them proof of our faithfulness.  If no one accepts our invitation, then no one will become our trusted friend.  This is why God first loved us, then offered something which could be trusted, His dear son’s very life.  Christ is out here begging for an opportunity to be proven faithful 24/7 and God asks us to test him on His faithfulness to His promises.
So many people demand our trust, before they have given us anything real to validate that it is a “wise investment”.  Without a product to sell, it is a scam.  Rather like the good old “Brooklyn Bridge Scam”   But it does not stop the con artist from ripping us off does it.  They look good; they have their portfolios all backed and swear on their good character or name.  If we do not take the leap of faith, they also have tales to attempt to shame us for being cautious as they dangle the what might-have been's before us.  In the end, we have to accept the truth that, we the person, are of no interest to them.  That is the REAL bottom line.  They will be moving on to someone else who will give them what they want – it’s not personal!

But this is not right, that is why it hurts.  If anything, life is supposed to be personal.  That is ALL it is about, people and relationships.   What has happened to humanity, so many of us are unconscionable? People have no ears to hear themselves, how they interact, the words they hurl toward others, how disconnected they are.  They do not feel well at all, but if they were sick or hurt they sure would notice that they do not feel well at all – did you catch the difference?  There is a large one.
None of us have room to be offended, because we ARE the offender.  Maybe not all the time to each other, but we ALL are all the time to God’s son; end of story!  He has already let us off the hook.  He is not offended; He gladly paid the price for all our offenses.  He does get hurt when we reject His gift and keep on hurting others though.  He gets jealous when we worship other God’s and thumb our nose at Him.  But HE never stops loving us, reaching out to us and attempting to show us what is real.
In 2 Corinthians chapter 5 we are given a beautiful picture of Christ giving his life so that we can be tailored with a new suit of favor.  It states that he does not hold our past sins against us.  I can see him fitting us, stretching out his tape measure and holding up the material.  Our new label reads Gods Favor, but there are people selling other suits claiming that they are “tailor made” for us.  These knock offs are hard to distinguish at first glance. As we stated, con’s are good at their trade.   Satan tried to con Jesus into choosing his knock off over God’s tailor made suit of honor in Matthew 4:8 we are told.  The devil showed Christ his best stuff and said I will fit you in my best suit of glory if you will just bow down and worship me.  You can have it all…..why continue suffering when you have this right at your fingertips.  I am sure this one rolled out “Don’t you deserve it Jesus, really now…..think about it….after all you’d been through and done? Think about yourself for a minute!  
These con’s and distortions are being touted amidst us and even coming out of our very own mouths much of the time.  If we are willing to be honest, we will acknowledge it, if not….we’ll move on.
For the next few days I want you to pause and think about all the conversations going on around you, because they do not stop. They are not only around us, they are within us, in our hearts and mind.  We have discussed this topic often. How will you view them?  How will you approach them? What will you say when it is your time to speak up? Each conversation is real, even if you are having it alone.  If it is a memory, we project others into them; we speak for them and give them our own perspective.  We project and set future events and God says this actually puts future events into motion.  IF they were not real, they would not change us or the happenings in our life.   
Second point we want to think about is this:  Any conversation which you keep, even if to ponder if you are going to keep it or toss it out, you agree there is some validity to it, or you would have already tossed it.  If we make room for the things we “hold against “our self or others in our closet, we will be pulling them out and sporting them, or dressing someone else in them.  Sometimes we don't like what is in our closet and we want to find someone else to throw it off on - after all, isn't that the nice thing to do.  Sometimes, we just think our stuff is really great and believe everyone would look better if they just dressed like us.  
But what about when we take it a step further and begin to tailor them in our own creations?  We pull out our measuring tape and size them up.  We hold up our fabrications and drape them well.  What a prideful, arrogant thing to do.  Now think about how offended we become when someone likes what their own clothes better.  What do we do when people do not want to change just because we said so?    
The reason we need to be trust worthy before someone considers our opinions is because we are supposed to be helping them with discerning their look, confronting them with objective feedback and telling them when they have pulled out a suit with the wrong label.  But we are to do this in love, not rip their garments off and mock their choices.  Proverbs 19:11 states that “sensible people control their temper; they earn respect by overlooking wrongs.
Let's not treat others as though they are misfits.  Remember, they have a personal designer who knew exactly how He wanted to dress them.  He knew how each design would be fashioned to show off His creative genius. Before we choose to cast our opinions out there, I pray we pause and withdraw our critical eye, stop reforming them into our own image and then look again.  I pray we see them.....really see them and become overtaken by His glorious finished work.
Today, I pray that we look around in appreciation of the ministry of reconciliation and thank God that we all are well suited in favor and being worn by Christ himself.

Hallelujah!
Kisses,
Candace 

Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®
©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Copy Rights Reserved


March 1, 2013

Raised in Peace

None of us were able to choose the space which we were raised up within,  but there we were.  Some of us had it better than the others; some of us had more stuff than the next guy.  Some of us had more love, while others had no guidance.  While I would like to think that every adult around us did the best that they could, we all know this is not the case.  Some people just care more about themselves and what they want to the detriment of those they are to be caring for.

Even with that being stated, our good experiences do not come from those around us.  Those around us can make our experiences better or a hardship, but no one can define our own life experience except our self. Christ himself, said (John 16:33) "I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world."  and in 2 Corinthians 1:2-4 it states: Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.  Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ the Father of mercies  and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our tribulations, that we may be able to comfort those who are in any trouble, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. 

Ultimately, where we were raised is just the ground which gave us life.  The people who affected our informative years cannot effect our lives when we are no longer living upon their turf.  Now we alone are accountable for what raises up from within us.  Here is the problem, the torments in life are not from out there........they are coming from inside us.  If you are not keeping your peace, you have no ability to comfort anyone.  Dare I say you will be the crucible of much negative effects, much like trying to cuddle a porcupine.

We have been speaking about trustworthy and faithful relationships.  God is faithful, Christ has taken care of the burden of proof.  Listen to what is going on around you, eradicate the clanging cymbals and hear the still small, wise voices.  There are as many of those around as the blow-hards, you just have to get far enough away from their boisterous blasts to hear the calm grounding things.  James (in Chapter 3  verse 17, 18) wrote for us: But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy.  Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who MAKE peace.

If the people around you are not "those who MAKE peace.....don't MAKE a life with them - or guess what....the life made will have NO peace externally.  While you surely can still have peace in this world even in that space....is that really a wise ground to start building your house upon?

We will get to what to do if your house has already been build.  We are just laying the foundation (pun intended ;)  In the mean time meditate on this: 
 
But wisdom that is from above is FIRST pure....THEN peaceable, gentle (and here is my favorite part) WILLING TO YIELD, yes WILLING to yield (no fights about it....just willing!) full of mercy AND good fruits without partiality and without hypocrisy (isn't that something?). 

My love to each of you - sweet dreams,
Kisses,
Candace

Kaleidoscope Butterfly, Inc®
©Candace Huffmaster 2013, All Copy Rights Reserved