God is Not About YOUR Success - by Os Hillman

"I tell you the truth, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life" (John 12:24-26).

God is all about your death so that HIS success can be realized through you! This is why the Church is having such little impact - there are too many believers who have not yet died to their old nature so that Christ can live fully through them. When believers come to the end of themselves they will lose their lives to Him and live through the power of the Holy Spirit and begin to see the reality of a living gospel that impacts lives, workplaces, cities and nations.

"Much of modern Christian enterprise is 'Ishmael.' Born not of God, but of an inordinate desire to do God's will in our own way - the one thing our Lord never did," said Oswald Chambers. The psalmist describes what it means to live in our own strength:

"Unless the LORD builds the house, its builders labor in vain. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain. In vain you rise early and stay up late, toiling for food to eat - for he grants sleep to those he loves" (Ps 127:1-2).

How does one die so that Christ can be our all and all? It usually takes a crisis of significant proportions for most people to relinquish the control of their lives. It means we come to the end of ourselves and our striving to control the events in our lives and we finally come to the place where we can say, "Lord, I surrender. Please take full control of my life."

Have you come to this place with God in your life? Let go and let God make you a success His way.

After reading this devotional by Os – I was reminded of something in my journal back in 2003 or 4. After reading it I thought I would share it. I understand much of it now – but do not want to change any words because this is a journey and a process. Where ever you are know that God is always watching over you, teaching you, growing you. His desire for you is abundant love….no matter what it looks like from our eyes and mind ‘this day”. I am on the other side of where I was; much like Alice and her looking glass. God has truly grown me to understand what He told me so long ago: The sojourn is the answer; the questions an endless plight….Be still and know that I am God…and I love you: deeply, honestly, passionately, freely – always in all ways.

God let my spirit help me understand your will. I love you and I know you are with me. Please talk to me. What am I feeling? This talks to me so: Beautiful, wondrous is what you are to me. I love you still you have always been mine I am always here for you. I am your lord and you are my child I embrace you as you embrace me. You have always been mine, now you only see me this world cannot have you Candy you are mine and I will and have saved you.

Where did it all go? That was weird! You know me Father; you know my heart because it is yours. Your heart is strong, your mercy great. Let it all go. You are not about this world. Let me take you there. Follow. You have peace because you live in me. I dwell in you. You are save and at home. I will nurture you and I am embracing you. You are part of a big home. That will never end. You have been on a journey to learn. I am about to let you be…. Be what? What you are to be. There is one thing…. What is the one thing? Follow me. I hear you; I desire you…. I will follow. Are you sure? That frightens me… what are you asking? That is the one thing. How can you be afraid if you are ready? There is no fear in love. Would I ever hurt you? This world will hurt you; not me! You are safe in me. Give it time. It will come. Don’t be cautious with me, your discernment is for this world not for my kingdom. You have been broken; you tried to fix it…. there are still a few things. Father, stop the business, let me be only busy for your purposes. I don’t care about this world. I don’t want comfort that is of this world; I want to live and breathe your comfort. Have I always been with you, I mean, as you have always been? Have we all always been? What is this we are playing out? What is our purpose? Is it “the solution to our will”? If that is the case, I just want to say I don’t want to have a will separate from your will - I want to only see you. I have known some “great” men here… I have yearned for their love. I get it now; I was to yearn for you first. And I realize that if it had not have happened this way I would not have developed as you needed me.

Why wind? Why fragrance? Why sunshine? They are all beauty you desire. The wind embracing and refreshing you; the touch of the sun on your flesh; the beautiful smells which engulf and propel you…..it is just simple things I can do to bring my love into and around you. I do not want to type what I am thinking….. Will you help me with this one? Why does it still hurt so? Why do I long so? I know….they are beautiful memories. If things could have been different they would have been different but they are not; I understand. I made my choices. I did not follow my heart. But I did do what I thought was right. It was not what was going to make you internally happy though…. Just physically; right? You did not trust me. You were not walking with me. You were led by fear. Satan is fear. Fear is not a guide - only wisdom and insight are from me. Love you still….. I will always be here for you. The relationships here on earth are only temporary. In my kingdom they will not be as they are here and all will be well. For now I have other things in store for you. You will find happiness…. in me… always! I will not let you be incomplete; you know that. I love you. Enjoy! You have much, you are loved, and you are comfortable.

I do love you father. I always have. Thank you……
Kisses,
C